On how and why I blog

The “how I blog” aspect has always been a matter of logistics. It doesn’t take much time as I already have these thoughts roaming my brain and it is not as if I am artificially taking pictures of little man. He is the most photographed child on the planet (behind the Gossling eight). Using our laptop initially it was very easy to type with Hudson cuddled close on my chest napping. Later I resigned myself to only being able to blog when he was eating, intensely playing, or in his crib sleeping because he was so engrossed with the keys and buttons of the laptop. Recently we fabulous gift of all: a broken laptop which allows both of us to joyously type together!

Then:


Now:
The “why I blog” is a chasm of ever changing reasons. Originally I wanted to articulate how I felt about motherhood and its many facets, to communicate to a grown up Hudson the realities of his childhood with the most detailed baby book ever and finally to provide myself with a creative outlet for both writing, which I have always done, and photography, which I have always loved. Lately, however, it seems blogging has allowed me to be as more reflective and lucid. I talk often about “Mommy Mushbrain.” I know at one point in my life I was smarter! So often my brain feels like a jumbled mess and the occasional twenty minutes of blogging time organizes thoughts and hopefully allows me to appreciate the goodness motherhood has brought to my life. Yes, I hope to engage readers, yet I am confident my brain ramblings are not always stimulating!

For example, on the eve of Hudson’s eye (or do I call it face?) surgery my brain is in OVERDRIVE. I do not feel reflective or lucid at all. Here are my current thoughts—none of which are rousing enough for a blog—or inspirational enough for a phone call to a friend:

*Surgery. Tomorrow. Be there to check in at 6:30 a.m.
*When am I going to work out? I have tried going to aerobics and they (stupidly) have a full view glass door between the exercise room and the nursery and he just stands there and screams bloody murder. I left after ONE song Monday in tears myself.
*He is pointing at everything. Do not be offended.
*Why is he suddenly resisting foods he has always eaten? And why is he not eating pasta one day, but he will the next, then he won’t again? Where did my content little eater go?
*Sometimes when I drive I get honked at because I am checking out Hudson’s sleeping face in the rearview mirror.
*I am not looking forward to shoe season nor am I ready for when he walks into stores. Regardless, he needs some footwear before fall.
*Every day he pats this tin “Hudson” sign by his door as Josh or I say, “Play like a champion today”. (Immediately go watch the movie Rudy if you do not understand this.)
*Have I mentioned how well he is going to bed and napping these days?
*Since he resists my attempts to leave a room he is playing in, I have used his help to go and fetch laundry baskets. He pushes them where I need them to go happily. (Thank goodness since I can not carry both!)

*His newest sleeping position is on his knees, butt high in the air. LOVE IT.

I am stopping because I feel better!

Finally, an article I recently read called Mommy bloggers the most narcissistic stupid people in the world: Narcissistic because we assume that our lives are worth the time of others, and stupid because we give strangers (not to mention family) ammunition for criticizing our parenting choices. Well, I write more for reassurance than self-love AND I only knew Hudson was hungry for lunch today because he crawled under the kitchen table and started eating dropped Cheerios and cantaloupe from yesterday (or maybe the day before). Judge away!