Letter of apology

Dear Friends with children older than mine,

(a.k.a. Everyone I knew before Hudson was born)

I need to apologize. Unbeknownst to you, I judged your housekeeping abilities.

Yes, I –childless and fancy free—left your homes thinking that housekeeping and child-rearing did not have to exist on different planets. I deemed I do better. I assumed it was not that hard to keep the windows free of handprints, your car free of dunes of crumbs, and your dirty dishes off the countertops.

Then my own human tornado was born.

Oh how silly I was. Why did you let me ramble on during pregnancy about the woes of labor? We should have been talking about how to remove juice from every fabric. We should have been talking about appropriate words to scream when one steps on an itty-bitty toy walking through every room. We should have been talking about lowering my standard to, well, that of a mother.

My first indication that I was going to quickly have to let my house go was that I quickly let myself go. Showering became a moment of treasure, rather than a daily routine. Even if I squeezed that in, I cut my hair to a style that would either do it itself or not look like quite the “fro” when I did not have time to touch a comb. Finally, my clothes, permanently stained from foods that I never touched now line my closet. I no longer wear white.

For those of you who by some miracle were able to maintain a tidy household during “the toddler years”, I can only assume you do not enjoy sleeping like I do. I can only assume you don’t pick up an entire room of toys to have them IMMEDIATELY dumped back out. Either that or your obsessive tendencies need to see a therapist immediately.

Tonight we are hosting a church dinner and tomorrow a playdate. Suddenly, I understand that there are more important things than a dusted piano and laundry-free hamper. And kidding aside—I also understand those things are not sleeping.

Love,
Heather
P.S. Mom, how did you manage to return my son to me with every single item of clothing washed and his booster seat cleaner than the day I brought it home from the store? I am exhausted just thinking about it!

Far away from dirty laundry and dust.