He's baaaaaaaaaack

For a very long time I did not want to be a mama. It was an ironic feeling too because I have always been "mothering", but the reality of being responsible for a whole little person was just too much for me to comprehend. Not to mention I was so worried that I would just mess a child up.
Josh and I married each other with the understanding that we might not have kids. It was not something either of us felt we had to do. This weekend we talked about it, and neither of us know when our perspective switched. But at some point five years ago we did decide we would like to have a child, and I know for myself, when I was told by a doctor that I might NOT be able to have babies, I wanted them even more. A want became a need and we worked to make it happen. Thankfully, God helped us.

Here we are with two children. We've underwent major changes in attitude, mindset, and life plan within the a very short period of time. And, naturally, can not imagine life any other way. Matter-a-fact, without Little Man around the past couple of days, I have literally pondered exactly what did I do before kids. What was a normal evening like? Was my house always immaculate? And most importantly, did I know what I was missing?

Life has evolved better than I could have ever envisioned. While sometimes uncomfortable, changes in attitude, mindset, and life plans are the usually the moments where we grow the most. I will try to not fear them so much. I love my house of choo choo trains and hunger cries. Even if I am still worried I will mess them up.