One of my favorite moments of the day is when I sneak into Hudson’s room before I go to bed. I need just that one last look at his sweet, sleeping face before I close my eyes. Every single night since he was born I do this. A couple of tired nights I have made it into bed and then realized I forgot to go and look at him, so I got out of the nice warm bed to check him out.
Because my eyes are not always quite ready for the darkness of his bedroom, I have to use some light to see him. If I have it on me, my cell phone gives off enough light. So does the baby monitor/phone screen. At about age three months I found an old flashlight which now it sits in the diaper changing basket on his dresser. That is my usual standby. I turn on the flashlight and project it into my leg and creep very quietly across the room to his crib and then shine the light on the ceiling to see him.
Early on in Hudson’s life we started referring to his sleeping positions by nicknames. If both arms were up, that was “I surrender”. In the beginning he frequently was in the pose “Statue of Liberty” (one arm up and one folded at his chest) or “Zoro” (one arm at his side and the other by his mouth like he is holding a cape). Now he tends to be in “Walk like an Egyptian” (self explanatory if you are a child of the 90s) or “What’s That” (characterized by his neck and head awkwardly craned towards the wall).
It is at these nighttime stalking when I just want to pick him up and hold him forever. He looks absolutely peaceful and I just want to be a part of it. But, so far I haven’t bothered him. One night I will.
Last night Josh and I spent our first night away from Hudson ; he stayed here with Grandmama and Grandpa. We went out to dinner and got a hotel room on the northside of Indy. The goal was to sleep soundly all night long and wake up when we were ready, not to the sound of squeals and squeaks from the other room at 4:30 a.m. However, I missed my last peek at his sleeping face. I missed knowing which pose he fell asleep in. I missed my alarm of squeals and squeaks. I missed my little man. We both did. Although dinner was amazing and the room wonderful, I slept horribly. And for some reason, that makes me feel marvelous.
Because my eyes are not always quite ready for the darkness of his bedroom, I have to use some light to see him. If I have it on me, my cell phone gives off enough light. So does the baby monitor/phone screen. At about age three months I found an old flashlight which now it sits in the diaper changing basket on his dresser. That is my usual standby. I turn on the flashlight and project it into my leg and creep very quietly across the room to his crib and then shine the light on the ceiling to see him.
Early on in Hudson’s life we started referring to his sleeping positions by nicknames. If both arms were up, that was “I surrender”. In the beginning he frequently was in the pose “Statue of Liberty” (one arm up and one folded at his chest) or “Zoro” (one arm at his side and the other by his mouth like he is holding a cape). Now he tends to be in “Walk like an Egyptian” (self explanatory if you are a child of the 90s) or “What’s That” (characterized by his neck and head awkwardly craned towards the wall).
It is at these nighttime stalking when I just want to pick him up and hold him forever. He looks absolutely peaceful and I just want to be a part of it. But, so far I haven’t bothered him. One night I will.
Last night Josh and I spent our first night away from Hudson ; he stayed here with Grandmama and Grandpa. We went out to dinner and got a hotel room on the northside of Indy. The goal was to sleep soundly all night long and wake up when we were ready, not to the sound of squeals and squeaks from the other room at 4:30 a.m. However, I missed my last peek at his sleeping face. I missed knowing which pose he fell asleep in. I missed my alarm of squeals and squeaks. I missed my little man. We both did. Although dinner was amazing and the room wonderful, I slept horribly. And for some reason, that makes me feel marvelous.
3 comments:
FYI...
He fell asleep in the 'What's that?' position.
I can completely and totally relate to this blog entry. Thank you for putting it into words. :)
All I can picture is Grandmama standing over Hudson's crib all night long - watching him. I'm surprised that she even put him down!!!! :)
Post a Comment