Exhaustion

There is a great scene in American cinema which every woman knows (should know-- for you younger readers). As the opening credits start to roll, Shirley Maclaine checks to see whether her infant daughter is breathing in her crib. First, she looks for the gentle rise and fall of her chest. Dissatisfied, she crawls into the crib. Still not happy with her conclusions, she pinches her newborn leaving her screaming, but definitely alive. Comforted, Mom Shirley walks out of the room.

I thought that scene was funny until I started living it.

Hudson is doing pretty well with sleeping after each feeding. Most of the time I have to go in and comfort him once and he is off to La La Land. I, however, still get up continually and go to check and see if he is still breathing. Last night I could feel myself at that moment where sleep was about to overtake my body collide with something from deep within some part of my psyche necessitated that I get up and confirm what I already "knew" ...Hudson was perfectly fine and asleep. (I was after all sleeping with the baby monitor in my hand.)

Women, I implore: Why are we this way? Josh has never gotten up--on his own volition--just to check and see if Hudson was breathing.

Since we have become parents we have come across many ingenious products: Wee Wee blockers (more necessary than one might think), pacifiers that close before they hit the ground (amazing), Mother's Milk Lactation Tea (shut up! it is delicious), etc. But why can't they come up with some product that would allow me to comfortably sleep for the three hours my son does between feedings at 1 a.m., 4 a.m., 7 a.m.???

Being a mother is fabulous. It is also exhausting. But I don't think Hudson is to blame...


P.S. The fore mentioned movie Terms of Endearment is not highly regarded by men. I used to think they (men) were just insensitive; however, now I understand--they don't GET it.